Jokes on Real Estate

Comedy on buying buildings, or a house etc:

I do not think we should build houses on the Green belt, but what if he makes the houses green, does that make it OK?

What do you call a conservatory, that is owned by labour party member?

A labialist

(get it Conservative Tory, = Labour Socialist)

If you pour cottage cheese on a skykraper, does that make it a cottage skyskraper?

If you put cheese on a cottage, is it a cheese cottage?

Someone told me to invest in property, so I bought some high quality tea.

Invest in bricks and mortar, they said, that is the last time I put my money into a cement mixer

I was playing monopoly against a buddy of mine, He was beating I so much, that he tried to put a houses on top of another ones and called it a skyskraper.

My house is a converted barn, we don't have a budgie, we have barn owl.

How to increase the price of your house

Put a picture of the sea, behind the window. To say it has a view of the ocean.

Put an oil well in the garden

Then put some oil around it to make it look like you have struck oil.

Put a bouncy castle on top of the house to make it look like your houses is bigger than it is.

Put a mirror in the biggest room and say that is another room through there to make the room bigger than it is.

Paint the house brown and say it is chocolate house,

Paint the house silver and say it is a silver house.

Talk on the phone trying to pretend you don't want to be heard, saying "I cannot believe I am selling this house for such small ammount of money".

What would be good names for soccer sides that are using people from the Real Estate business

Real Estate FC. (Like Real Madrid)

Aston Villa timeshare, or timeshare Villa (Like Aston Villa)

Converted Barnsley

Sten house muir F.C. (Stenhousemuir)

Crystal My house is a Palace (Crystal Palace)

Converted Mill and wall (Millwall)

House beside a Port in a Vale (Port Vale)

Cow build aden beath F.C.

Real estate Index