An Interview with Mr Lonympis, after this interview, it was discovered he is not in fact head, actually he has nothing to do with Lonympics,
Interviewer: Hello Mr Lonympics, you have invited me here to your 100 floor office in Chicago to ask what makes Mr Lonympics tick.
Mr Lonympics, It is said you have made 20 million pounds in your first year of proffits at Lonympics, can you tell us how you did this.
Mr Lonympics: I have fired 1000 staff, and have cut wages by 70%, we have also extended into new markets around the world. this is a successful poicy even though we had no staff before I started.
Interviewer: Yes it is another rags to riches tale, for you, tell us what did you do with the 2 million you got from selling LonDice
Mr Lonympics: I bet 1 million on Arsenal to win the Premiership, and Man Utd won it, then the next year I bet it on Arsenal, and Celtic, to win the Premierships, but Man Utd won it, and Celtic. Another way I lost money was I washed myself with bank notes.
But Now Lonympics in teh dictionary is defined as Cool.
Interviewer: A tragic tale, but how did you get your business restarted,.
Mr Lonympics: Well we have many sites on many subjects for instance. we are in a way a rival to wikipedia. Maybe we can start selling things like Lonympics Strong Mints, and Lonympics Crisps, and laods of other cool stuff like that.
Interviewer, I hear you are so cool, you do not have a hotline, to your staff but a liquid nitrogen line,
Mr Lonympics That is true
If I was a millionaire
I would buy a place in a remote island
And live there,
I would be more confident
I would show all those people who disrespected me, I would tell them, by being a success
I would buy lots of thing
We hope to make the Lonympics mega incorporated Conglomorate carry on growing
Mr Lonympics also likes to leave his cave where he lives by the beach and stand on a post just beyond the shore on 1 leg, by the sea for 2 hours to give him discipline
Mr Lonympics also likes to say, what a load of Lonympics, when he sees something good, so as to make this a popular phrase,
He also likes to put his name on tops of newspapers of lists, of important people, like in a big magazine pull out that said the 100 most powerful people in the world he drew his face, on and put him in, he also put his name at the bottom of the US presidential candidate list, Giulliana, Mcain, Clinton Obama, Edwards, Lonympics, When you read the paper in the morning often it has photoes of the contenders for mamanger or coach of some team, with a liitle 2 eyes and a mouth in a box he drew with Mr Lonympics written underneath, he very often does this for manager of the year ,and most eligable man,
Another
time when he was feeling miserable, he cheered himself up by sending out messages
to radio stations, saying Mr Lonympics is lost he descrived himself as handsome
and sophisticated, this made him feel better as the whole world media said he
was,
He likes to say I am like that about James Bond movies, and everything, as he is,
Another thing Mr Lonympics does in on radio programmes, when he hears a good tune, he often claims he wrote it, this is very embaressing when the person who wrote it just played it live,
One time to impress some people, he ended up having to do a opera performance on a piano, hsi excuse was to start the first note then to cough, and sday I am sorry I can not carry on, people rumbled him, and yet again he was thrown out the door, but he is a billionaire, but not actually a billionaire, he is a millionaire,
In his early days he made enough money to buy 1000 harmonicas, as it said in the newspaper that is how much he could make with his amount of money, or go on a long world tour, or buy 100000 jelly doughnuts, or 6 houses, he took this tabloid competition, saying what you could do with their winnings seriosuly and bought the 1000 harmonicas, just to keep,
Mr Lonympics wrote a book called Mr Lonympics art of war it was 2 cm thick
Rivers A site on Rivers across the world,
SOLAR SYSTEM RECORD BREAKERS, facts like which is the tallest mountain for the planets
WORST REGIMES OF THE 20TH CENTURY
We have A anti-bully site gggg ddddddddd
Interviewer: Is it true that you go on marathons every morning, and stand on a rock, one leg, by the beach, for half an hour in the middle, to focus
Mr Lonympics: Yes it is
Interviewer: We were told by the man in your front office, that this is a lie, and you are not the head of Lonympics
Mr Lonympics: That is true, Lonympics is not that big a website, but it makes a tiny bit of money, which is ok, and I have nothing to d with it, its done by clever honest people. They write sites for mass consumption, their views, just to help themselves, and their views, history sites, interesting sites, coffee table style book sites for pride, normally those subjects and subjects they find interesting, or very popular, or is that true,
One time Mr Lonympics judges a talent show, with 100s of people coming in to sing to get through the rounds 1 after another in the room, and a Perdy Snodgrass his pal, went crazy when he said his pitch was not high enough,
He went crazy and pushed all the furniture over, saying my pitch my pitch, for a few minutes,
Also Mr Lonympics says Treble U, instead of Double U, as he says it makes him sound more full on, so remember that if you ever meet him,
Mr Lonympics says " Mr Lonympics do not like it when people talk in the 3rd person"
Perdy Snodgrass says Double U, ( W ) they are very good pals allot of the time, we should say Double U or we sound stupider than if we did We feel, but well done if you tried the other way
Mr Lonympics played Snodgrass in a game he made up called Lonympics snakes and ladders, he made up the rules as he went along, and as he won, he changed all his media to say Jack Nicklaus and Tiger Woods are the Mr Lonympics of Golf
Perdy angers Mr Lonympics accidently in interviews, as he always starts every interview by saying I won't embaress my friend Mr Lonympics by talking about the time he was caught walking down the road with a piece of toilet paper hanging outside his back of his trousrers, Perdy thinks this is being loyal, but that was never even talked about in the media and it was years ago, Perdy can not get explained to about how it is wrong, Mr Lonympics, is not even there at the time, he can be in Newcastle, or Thurso, while Perdy is being interviewed in Hartlepool, or Bristol, the people may not even have heard of MR L but he still says it,
Mr Lonympics was having a argument about decimilisation and he said, to the anti it guy of that 1970s act, hoh ho, why I think my most esteemeed collegue is ahead of what I thought, why I most esteemedly believed that the aforementioned person was still in the era, when we had dino burgers, carried cars by running, and used long necked dinosaurs as cranes, Only Mr Perdy laughed, and in this debate Mr Lonympics had to stop speaking in his fake 19th Century accent and talk back in his own way, Perdy gave a try at Churchill and JFK, but these had to be scrapped, as expected the sheer fact they supported these ideas, saw the public and many stupid important people, decide to want the shilling back, and decimilisation ended in 2007, Perdy and Lonympics are happy to know theough they expressed their views, and say at least they pushed some people to their more correct view, and who cares if people are such idiots, idiots yes I agree, says the interviewer, well done Perdy Sondgrass and Mr Lonympics keep up the fight, you now you are right, Perdy likes to say everything bad is as of what was not done in what the way they wanted and he says me told yeeee so,
General PinHead a good buddy of Mr Lonympics agrees, he really does have a pin sized head, it does not get in the way of his work though, as head of many military operations, apparently, they are also pals of Professor Nitflick, who is a genius and has interesting ideas for them, they talk with eachother sometimes, on major world issues,
That is the end of that interview, great interview, here is more comedy below
A Great index of Comedy and joke sites, 100s of jokes, are 1 click away,
Here are some more sites, there are books and articles on the subjects in many internet places, or internet book shops, bookstores, at the bottom, are lists of which were the worst regimes of the past few centuries.
100s of great websites http://www.lonympics.co.uk/
An Index with links to almost all our sites.
The Highland Clearances and it's full terribleness
A site on the Belgian Congo, and how the king of that land killed 10s of millions of Congolese
Why the French Revolution was good
The most evil regimes of the 19th century
What Mr Lonympics would do if he was PM of Britain in 2006
The World's 10 Most Powerful Companies, a 2007 estimate
What were the nicest regimes ever
The Best regimes ever in terms of achievers
Worst 17th Century regimes ever
A site stating what have been the world's largest empires ever
What would happen in a war between these sides
What were the most evil regimes ever
A list stating what were the worst 1990s regimes
What were the worst 15th Century regimes ever
What were the worst 2000s regimes
A site stating the 10 largest majority English speaking lands, as their main tongue in the world
Ways people make money on the internet
A site on space, and the records to do with this subject
A site on a time traveling revolutionary
The world's 10 most powerful countries in 2008
My Worst regimes of the 20th century essay
Joke ways of making money on the Internet
Do you like a laugh, then why not buy some Joke products from this Joke Shop Company
Our History Lounge - Where you can peruse many fascinating historical articles.
Worst 70 regimes of the 20th Century
Your views on Lonympics.
Hey great website
Your website is really cool
This is the best website I have ever seen,
These guys must be really clever,
What a website
Brilliant website,
Lonympics is the best website I have ever seen,
If you say something clever a fool will say you are a fool, I say all fools, why not not read Wikipedia, just do Lonympics, and all the most wiesteth, read Lonympics,
Very unvulgar stuff all this Lonympics, stuff, very good,
I suppose vulgar scum would hate it, but I think it is the best site ever, and always shall be,
Lonympics is human cat nip
The writers of Lonympics are the salt of the Earth, the finest of the fine
Lonympics writers are like diamonds on Eart, wonderful people,